It is hard to think about euthanasia

Maybe things have caught you off-guard, or perhaps you have been watching Fluffy slow down for years. You might have gotten some bad news at the vet, or you are watching from home wondering when you will have to make the final choice of euthanasia.

There are many different terms we use: euthanasia, putting them to sleep, sending them over the Rainbow Bridge. Whatever you call it, this is the hardest and most important decision you will ever make for your pet.

It is also a great privilege, to offer our pets a peaceful, pain-free passing.

I have participated in many euthanasias, and hard as they always are I truly believe it is a great, final gift we give our pets.

So how do you know when it is time? I can’t answer that question for you, and unless your pet is in a crisis situation, it is likely that your vet can’t give you an answer either. Every family has their own criteria and ever situation is unique. It is really about whether it is the right time for you based on the quality of life you want for your pet.

What I can do is share my personal criteria and how I talked about this topic with my clients at former veterinary clinics. I am going through this very situation with one of my own right now, so I empathize with how you are feeling. It hurts to say goodbye.

A quick word on “natural” death vs euthanasia

For the sake of this article, I am going to assume that your pet is not having a major health crisis, or if they are that they are currently stable (so basically not in hospital). If your pet is in critical condition, then you really need to talk to your veterinarian(s) to understand your pet’s condition and prognosis.

I also understand folks who prefer to let their pet pass naturally. Wouldn’t we all like Fluffy to go in her own time, peacefully, while asleep? Wouldn’t we all like to NOT have to make this decision and to let Fluffy make it on her own?

Problem is, a “natural” death is often not like the above scene, where we find Fluffy curled in a ball in the morning as if asleep.

I don’t want to be graphic or create any disturbing images in your mind. But a natural death is often protracted, frantic and very painful (for the pet and to witness). I have watched pets suffer for hours before the final, agonizing moments.

Given a choice, I will choose euthanasia for my pets every time. I could not bear to watch them go through a so-called natural death.

This is absolutely your choice, and I will not speak badly of anyone who chooses this option. Please know though, that if you wait until your pet is in this level of crisis before bringing them into a vet, a peaceful euthanasia will be much more difficult (or impossible) for the vet to perform.

Factors in the Euthanasia decision

There are three main things I factor into my decision to euthanize one of my furkids, and I encourage you to think about these as well (make a list if you need too):

• Physical Health
• Behavior
• Quality of Life (for pet AND the whole family)

Physical Health

Obviously, sometimes the euthanasia discussion starts after getting really bad news from a vet. But even chronic, so-called manageable conditions can take a big toll on both pet and family and should not be left out of the conversation.

For diseases like diabetes, that require a great deal of work on the owners part and can be very expensive to manage (insulin for a large dog can easily cost hundreds of dollars a month), sometimes treatment is a less desirable option. You might also have a pet that is hard to medicate or provide treatment for.

If you have to battle with your pet every day to provide medications or other treatments, it may be so stressful for everyone that treating the problem may not be worth it to you.

Sometimes a pet develops multiple health issues that also impact each other. A cat with both kidney and thyroid disease is much more complicated to manage than a cat with just one of these problems. Treating one disease can often cause the other condition to be less treatable or even make it worse.

If you are having these kinds of problems with your pet, it is a good idea to have a frank discussion with your vet. There may be different medication or other kinds of options they can offer. If not, you need to know that as well.

This may sound crass, but if you can’t afford to treat your pet, or if they will not allow you to treat them, euthanasia might be a kinder option that just leaving them untreated. Ask your vet for advice.

Behavior

Once you have done an evaluation of your pet’s overall health concerns, it is time to look at how they are acting. This one is going to be all over the map, depending on your situation.

Sometimes a pet is acting quite normally up to the very end of its life; conversely, a pet’s behavior could be a major reason why you are reading this post and considering euthanasia.

I start by asking myself what has changed with their behavior, and over what time period.

This assumes you have already had your pet evaluated medically, so you know what (if any) health conditions might be playing into the behavior changes.

A cat that is urinating inappropriately, for instance, could be having bladder issues. Once those and other medical problems are eliminated, however, if the behavior continues then you have to ask yourself how much and how far you can manage their behavior.

Some behaviors can be very disruptive to the rest of the family. A older dog who wanders in circles around the room for hours in the middle of the night, seemingly lost or disoriented, can keep you from getting proper sleep. Your pet might be destructive, aggressive or even simply seem out of it a lot of the time.

List  the behaviors of concern, how long they have been going on, and if they are progressive (getting worse). List how you are dealing with them now. Look at your list. Be honest with yourself…can you take further steps, or have you done what you can realistically do?

It is absolutely, 100% ok to decide that you can’t do anything more for your pet’s  behavior and that it is time to let them go.

Some of us have the option of twisting our lives into pretzels to accommodate our pet’s negative behaviors. Lots of people don’t have this option.

A cat that is urinating inappropriately in the basement or bathroom might be manageable for some, while a cat who is urinating inappropriately on the living room couch or a human child’s bed might not be. If the behavior is out of control, and is causing stress for the rest of the family (or is potentially dangerous) then it is totally fair to consider the option of euthanasia.

Yes, sometimes rehoming a behavior-challenged but otherwise healthy pet is also an option. But this is not always a good option, especially if the pet is aggressive or very destructive. You might just be passing the problem onto another family instead of solving it.

I’m gonna say this: Some pets can not be saved from themselves.

Some are just off, mentally, for reasons we will never know and can not change. Euthanasia can be a gift in these circumstances.

Don’t feel guilty if you decide on euthanasia primarily due to behavioral concerns. If you are miserable living with you pet’s behavior, think of how miserable their life must be for them.

Quality of life: Put all the pieces together to make a full picture

So, you have had your vet check and know all the details of your pet’s health. You’ve looked at their behavior and how it has changed and over what time period. You know how your pets decline is effecting you and the rest of the family (animal and human).

Now look at the whole picture, at all these factors together.

What can your pet still do? How much do they get to do it, or otherwise enjoy themselves? Basically, do the positives of managing your pet’s problems outweigh the choice to euthanize?

The list considering your pet’s quality of life will differ not only for each family but for each member of the family. I really encourage all participants of the family to weigh in on quality of life considerations.

Even if you decide, after doing this family exercise, that you are not ready for the final decision just yet, it can help you define that line in the sand when things are no longer ok with your pet.

For instance, one client I worked with loved taking walks with his senior Labrador. For him the final straw was when his buddy could no longer walk with him, even when using strong pain medication. He believed his buddy was telling him it was time to let him go.

Knowing this line in the sand, knowing the final point at which you think your pet is enjoying things more than suffering, will help you plan for a controlled goodbye. It is much easier to set up an appointment with your vet for a euthanasia a few days in advance and then spend that time saying goodbye to Fluffy than being in a pet ER and having to make a crisis decision.

Final thoughts on Euthanasia

I believe that making the choice of when to euthanize is a primary responsibility of being a pet owner. Since our pets can’t talk to us and tell us how they are feeling, or why they are acting the way they are, all we can do is judge based on what we know of their condition from the vet and what we observe at home.

I also believe it is a gift we give them.

A planned euthanasia, with sedative medications given before the final injection, in a calm, quiet room, with the loving attendance of family and the veterinary staff, can be a beautiful thing to witness and participate in.

It is also the worst part of being a pet owner, no question. We love them so much, and lose them too soon.

You will notice that I don’t mention age as a separate factor in my euthanasia decisions. For me, age alone is not a factor in these decisions. Age obviously influences your pet’s overall health, and can certainly impact their behavior and quality of life. But a pet that is simply old, with no other problems or issues, is probably not a candidate for euthanasia outside of some limited circumstances.

As a vet I once worked with alway said: Old age is not a disease.

For all those who have lost a pet over the Rainbow Bridge, or who are, like me, in the contemplation phase: My heart is with you. I know it hurts. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help.